Childrenisms

Here's your monthly dose of comic relief.
Either that, or reassurance that you and your kids aren't the "only ones."
Whatever you need. We are here for you.


When my baby sister was 3 and I was 17, I told her that a monster lived in the mailbox
and ate all the mail. Yea, she cried every time we pulled into the driveway after that.
My dad made me walk her to the mailbox every day for a week to de-bunk the terror.
She was also deathly afraid of water, loud noises, and her own shadow.
With 4 older siblings, she's lucky she's not in therapy.

The legacy of fun continued with my own children in the bathtub one night...
Isaiah: Jubee, see that drain? You gonna go down it."
Judah: "What?"
Isaiah: "Yup. You are gonna go down the drain."
Judah: "I don't und-a-stand."
Isaiah: "You. Down the drain."
Judah: "Huh?" #scarredforlife



Me (slightly losing my cool): You guys are VERY crazy.
Judah: We not that crazy.

Isaiah: "Why you cleaning the house, momma?"
Me: "Because we live here and make messes."
Isaiah: "Why?"
Me: "Because that's what we do."
Isaiah: "Why?"
Me: "I don't know."
Isaiah: "Why?"
Me: *banging head on wall*
I fall for the "why" cycle EVERY. TIME.

Me: "Judah, we only use scissors at the table."
Judah: "Whaaaat?"
Me: "You heard me. Table. Scissors."
Judah: "What in the world?"
Me: "I'm going to take them away if you can't listen."
Judah: "What da heck?"
two going on twelve.


On our way out of Target:
Me: "Don't touch the bags, Isaiah!"
Isaiah: "Knock it off, you're driving me nuts!"
wonder where he heard that before.

Judah sleep talks. It's proven to be quality entertainment.

Out of a dead sleep one night:
"I want my coffee!"

During naptime:
"Gimme M&Ms... the ones in your pocket!"


Whilst using the bathroom...
Me: Isaiah, please close the door so I can have some privacy.
Isaiah: "Um. Of course. Sure, mom."
Joy erupted in my heart... prematurely.
He stepped INTO the bathroom and THEN closed the door.


Judah: Dwamn it.
Me:
Judah: Only mommas say that word?
Me:


GIVING AWAY $200 worth of Visa gift cards this week!!!
ENTER TO WIN BEFORE YOU GO!!!