Friday, March 7, 2014

Dear Mom, lower your expectations.

Yesterday I stood in mismatched pajamas with the messiest of messy buns atop my still half asleep head
as my freshly showered, sharply dressed husband hugged me goodbye on his way out the door for work.
Inner monologue: "I do not hate my husband I do not hate my husband..."

Meanwhile, the kids were fighting over who got to put their finger in the empty screw hole (yea)
on the table between shouting demands for MORE peanut butter to not put into their mouths, oh no,
but all over my wall. I'd love to raise a Picasso... some other time.


"Yea, have fun on your VACATION to the office," I quipped to Nathan.
"It must be nice to go to a place where everyone took a shower, dressed themselves,
brushed their teeth..."


Oh I was laying it on thick. I don't need him thinking for ONE MINUTE that this stay-at-home mom
business is for Grey's Anatomy re-runs and bon-bons. Try Sesame Street and an endless raisin buffet
that ends up all over the floor, stuck to my socks, ground into the carpet.

"Have fun in the mosh pit?" he stated in hopes of making me laugh.
"Just turn up the music - they are already tearing it up."

Yea, all he got was some pursed lips and rolling eyes.

At this point I started fake crying. I'm not sure if it was because my kids were now throwing
chewed celery sticks at each other or due to the fact that I probably wouldn't be able to even
put on a bra until at least noon.

"I hate you for leaving," I moaned.
"You're beautiful!" he responded.
To which I laughed in his face... silently calculating the hours in my head until he would be home
again to relieve me from the insanity. I began hallucinating... a raisin-free taco buffet and
a bottomless margarita glass.

And then he went and blessed the mess outta me with three little words:

"LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS."

Let's all *SIGH* together.

I just nodded my head, knowing he was right.

How easy it is for me to make my list and do, do, do all the things that I think make a happy
home, husband, kids... a happy me. Because we all know that beds that are made equal bliss. NOT.

Those three little words mean "LET IT GO" to me.
They mean "SURVIVE." They mean "PAID TIME OFF."
They mean "QUIT TRYING TO HOLD IT ALL TOGETHER SO HARD."

Dear mom, sometimes your kids wake up on the wrong side of the bed, and sometimes you wake up
on the wrong side of the bed. Whether that makes you Godzilla or an emotional ship wreck - it's ok
to take a "breather"... all day long if necessary. Lower your expectations. Go ahead. Turn on Grey's
and eat a bon bon or 10. It's going to be ok. Bras are for weaklings.



____________________________________

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15 comments:

  1. Ohhhh sister, preach it!! I am living in Newbornland (as I lovingly call it) and boy, oh boy, "productivity" is overrated. Or perhaps wrongly defined. I'm reminded again that this is a SEASON and one day we'll really miss the celery sticks and 2am feedings.

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    1. Yes, perhaps wrongly defined?! And it is so true - we are going to miss it! I get teary-eyed thinking about it now. I'll be broken-hearted the day I have no little ones to beg me for peanut butter and trips outside. It's the BEST season!!!! Enjoy "Newbornland" <3

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  2. Haha I'm pretty sure my husband and I have had that exact interaction. Fake tears included. And he walks out smiling and kissing me while I fold my arms and pout.

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    1. And then you wonder... are they THRILLED to be leaving?!?!?! Lol. My husband always reassures me that he'd be willing to trade jobs, but I don't believe him!

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  3. This is so good, Brittany. I need to lower my expectations too and speak more calmly to my littles. Miss you mama Brittany! One day I'm going to get to see you again!
    Love,
    Jessie McGraw your former kcc poetry seat mate 😜

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    1. Aww hi, Jess!!! Of course I remember you! We need to catch up :-) Oh I know - that's one thing I'm working on this Lent - speaking kindly to my children. It's so easy to FREAK OUT when they do their CRAZY stunts! Lol. Sigh... motherhood. It's a good trip!!! XO

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  4. SO good :) I love it. What a sweet way for your man to bless you!

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  5. Oh girl, thank you for these honest words, I've had to lower my expectations a lot lately.

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    1. Good times huh, friend?! It helps though, right? I know that it makes a difference. Like a new pair of glasses to see the day. Takes the edge, stress off the million situations that are BOUND to come with a house full of kiddos! Hang in there!!! HUGS XO

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  6. I'm grateful to you and so many other moms out there in the blogging world who "keep it real" for those of us who haven't yet ventured into life as a mother. I *think* I want to be at home with my kids, but I need to realize it's not all sunshine and daisies every day, either. Being a mom is hard work, no matter if you work inside the home or out. Thanks again!

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    1. Aww haha, well that's awesome, Lauren! You're more than welcome to come on over... we'll "keep it real" in real time for ya! Lol. You might be scarred. No, it's a good time! It definitely has it's moments, but the HIGHS are way more frequent than the LOWS... and yea... that's why people have babies every day!!!! I'd say give being a staying at home momma a shot! It's a big job, but SO worth it!!!! Those little eyes that look back at you - or the arms (sticky though they may be) that wrap around your neck... PRICELESS. It doesn't get much more fulfilling than that.

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  7. This is wonderful. That picture is priceless!

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  8. The raisins!! And craisins too (my kids are obsessed). Seriously, we have them permanently stuck to the kitchen floor because I have been too lazy to get on my hands and knees with a razor blade to get them up.

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