I'm Not Scared of Babies...

So yesterday I landed myself in my OB's office with a lovely case of MASTITIS in my left breast. How's that for an opening sentence?! TMI? Lol. I couldn't get in to see my primary doctor who is pretty Catholic and awesomely supportive with Natural Family Planning... bummer. But I am pretty sure I shocked the doc on call and I hope he thinks about our conversation in the days to come :-) He must have looked at my chart and seen that I am not signed up for any prescribed birth control because he looked up at me and with much concern asked: "DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN GET PREGNANT WHILE BREASTFEEDING?!?!?!?! And you have a nine month old... it is TOTALLY POSSIBLE!" "Yes, I am well aware that I can get pregnant," I responded with a calm smile. "Well, you should tell your hubby to wear a condom," he said only WAY too nonchalantly. **uncomfortable laughing** ... "I am not scared of babies, doctor. Crazy... but... umm... believe it or not... we've chosen to be OPEN TO LIFE!" .... **doctor fidgets with my paperwork** "Well, just saying!" he finishes off. I was DUMBFOUNDED that he didn't even ASK if I was interested in having another baby. Nothing. Just straight up shot to the conclusion that I must not want any more kids right now since I have two boys under the age of two. I actually asked him if he was familiar with Natural Family Planning! He didn't know a whole lot and I think he summed everything up with, "Fertility is such a mystery." Yes, it is, doctor... yes, it is! A GOD-GIVEN mystery that we are privileged to share in with our spouse inside of MARRIAGE!!! I have a pretty cool spouse. I am so thankful that he respects GOD, me, and himself enough to refrain from using contraception. Very blessed. Just saying. Wanted to share this article that I wrote about a year ago as a church bulletin insert... (it is a rough draft - have mercy!) ... It was a warm summer day, August 14th, 2009, and I married my best friend. I think that most women can remember a time when they spent hours daydreaming about prince charming, a wedding, and happily ever after. As little girls we play house and baby - intricately weaving together a tapestry of what life will be like when we grow up and have a REAL husband and children. Fortunately, life was not meant to be lived out in a 3x4 dollhouse with plastic rainbows and butterflies that delicately decorate the front lawn. No, the real thing is not so pretty and organized, but it is a wild and wondrous life that brings much more joy than the imagination could ever possibly conjure. Two months after our wedding we were blessed with the news that our first child was on the way. This was it! We were married, going to have a dozen children, and it was going to be as easy as my parents made it look when I was growing up! Wrong. The doctors informed us that my uterus has been deformed since birth, and that the chances of any of our babies surviving the womb are less than 40%. It was a miracle that we even conceived, they said. After nine months filled with tidal waves of fear and emotion, I delivered, by the grace of God, our healthy, beautiful son, Isaiah. No greater joy. Nothing on earth can compare. You, who are already blessed to be parents, understand that even the daily hardships of having children: sleepless nights, teething tantrums, dirty diapers, etc. are NOTHING compared to the immense delight that children bring to your home. God has given us such a unique gift inside the sacrament of Holy Matrimony; the gift of being co-creators with Him. From the beginning, “Be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth and subdue it” (Gen. 1:28), He has been calling us as husbands and wives to be generators of life - for souls that are destined for Heaven. Most people don't realize that during a Catholic wedding ceremony the couple is asked to promise if they will be OPEN to receiving the children God has planned for them. This can be a scary commitment for some. What does this mean? You are promising in front of God, family, friends, and your spouse that you will not use any form of artificial contraception to prohibit God from using your union to produce children. The world tells us that avoiding children, having it your way, is best. Lies lies lies. God is never outdone in generosity. The REAL rainbows and butterflies are found in the field of obedience to the Lord and His Church. The REAL rainbows and butterflies are found in the fruit of the daily labor and sacrifices it takes to raise kids these days. Due to the fact that I had to deliver Isaiah via c-section, on top of having complications with my uterus, my husband and I discerned that it would be best to postpone pregnancy for at least one year until healing could take place. No, we didn't use “Catholic birth control,” but we used Natural Family Planning; the ONLY method the Catholic Church confirms as a moral way to space children under grave circumstances. Pope Pius XII states in Humane Vitae that these grave reasons must fall under one or more of these categories: medical, eugenic, economic, or social implication. He also goes on to say that it “Would be a sin against the very meaning of conjugal love for couples to use natural spacing methods for their own selfish benefit or growth.” Please see the encyclical, Humane Vitae, for further explanation. The beauty of using NFP is that there are no physical or chemical barriers between spouses. They are simply offering the fertile period of a woman's cycle up to the Lord as they fast from intercourse for a time. God is the Wild Card with NFP! There is always a chance for life when contraception is not involved. Proof of this, my husband and I conceived our second child only SIX months after the birth of Isaiah. Not what we had in mind, but God was ABLE to work inside our union and create the child that HE wanted us to receive. As scary as the news was for me, I knew in my heart that everything was going to be ok because GOD IS IN CONTROL. There is joy in being one - Lord, husband, and wife - and from that union of surrender comes great JOY IN LIFE! We are blessed with two children and I am thankful that we do not live in a dollhouse! The world of plastic people and magical make-believe cannot hold a candle to a life in the flesh lived out in the midst of real rainbows and butterflies that only God can supply.